The End of Marcus Brutus

Marcus Brutus 

    I know your probably wondering how I am writing this now that the worst has happened but I had to inform you of the tragedy. I committed suicide at the Battle of Philippi. My enemies have beaten me into the ground and this was the only solution. Strato held my sword while I ran toward it. I had to defeat myself before anyone else did. I did not want to give the victory of my death to anyone, espically not Antony and Octavius. Considering the way Cassius died, I wanted to be remembered in way. I want people to say, "Wow, that death was the most honorable I have ever heard of." I wanted it to be noble. I stayed to watch how the rest of the battle turned out. I was shocked but very pleased. My troops were now under the service of Octavius, they were not killed! Can you believe that?
    My wish and purpose of life was complete when Antony called me "The noblest Roman of them all", I felt as if my whole like was completed just by what he said. That meant the world to me. Espically since this came from Antony. I would imagine he'd say Caesar was the most noblest of all. I underestimated Antony. He also said I was loyal. They also provided me with a proper burial and that my body lie in Octavius's tent. This was another thing that made my life complete. When this happens, it signifies what a soldier you were and it comes with full honor. And I got that treatment!
    Now that everything is even and equal, I can return to my real home with my wonderful wife, Portia. I miss her and it's sad that this the way I'd see her again but I'd rather be with her. My life was definitely filled with honor. I hope I made my family proud and that they accepted my decisions. I also hope the Romans appreciate what I did for them. I always put them first and I hope they know that. My life was amazing and if it wasn't for the death of Caesar, maybe I would still be alive. But I don't want anyone to worry about the "what if's" or the "maybe's". We all deserve to move and on. Thank you to my audience that went through this experience with me. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did writing this. Live an honorable life and always keep others in mind. Don't let your ambition go to your head!

The Battle

   Things are chaos so far. I have defeated Octavius troops but Cassius has been defeated by Antony's troops. So many things are going on at once, I feel like my head is spinning. Things aren't looking so good for our side. Before the battle began, Cassius and I had an important discussion about what we would do if we lost this battle. Cassius said he would commit suicide. I disagree with that discussion. It is very cowardly and vile to kill yourself because of your scared about what could happen. Whatever happens, I decided I would go with the gods have in store for me. I would most certainly not go back to Rome though. Today has to be the end of what occurred on 15th of March. I said farewell to my dear friend Cassius.

Cassius and I speaking to Antony and Octavius

Philippi Battle

   I have just been informed by dear friend Cassius is dead. How is it that what we did to Caesar has resulted in more deaths than we started with? Should we even had killed Caesar? His death is really getting me to wonder if this was all worth it. I would rather has Caesar living than having everyone I know and love dead. The way Cassius died isn't right. He shouldn't have killed himself right away, he could of waited to see and notice that the crowd that took Titinius was actually our army. Not to be rude but covering his face wasn't so honorable, If I ever decided to commit suicide I wouldn't do it that way! But now I'm left alone, I don't want to lose faith. I keep encouraging my troops to keep their head high and keep fighting but deep inside, I'm starting to give up.
    How foolish is Antony'a side! I thought they
                   captured me! It was just one of my soldiers. I wonder what they would of done to me if it really was me. Lucilius knew that I was alive and defended me. That was a really brave move. Antony of course knew that it was not me because we talked before the battle and after Caesar's death.
    Before the battle began, Cassius and I spoke to Octavius and Antony. I knew this battle was going to happen but maybe Octavius and Antony would surrender but you know they did not. He was still very upset of what happened to Caesar, I mean it's understandable but he remembered and knew every detail that happened. Cassius told Antony that if it was his choice, Antony would of died along with Caesar. I didn't want this war to happen but if I could change who I killed, I would still leave the number to one and one only. I would not have killed Antony. Octavius was also upset. He knew how many wounds were on Caesar and was keeping score. How childish. The weather on this day was horrible. A storm was gathering and everything was on the line.
   The end of this battle is near and I will definitely keep my audience updated on what happens next in Philippi. I, myself would like to know before anything else happens.

Conflicts with Close Friends

  I have just returned from a dispute with Cassius. This war has caused stress on not only me but on Cassius as well. Things between Cassius and I all came out. He was confronting me and I was confronting him. He sold his political appointments for money to worthless men. After that we just kept arguing back and forth.
  I've heard Antony has came up with a list of people to kill, including 100 senators. All of us conspirators are on that list. I also heard Octavius and Antony are moving their forces to Philippi. I decided that we should march to Philippi and meet them before they get stronger and recruit more men. You can imagine who did not want to march. Cassius. But surprisingly he agreed! Maybe because we had just made up from our agreement but I'll take that! I suggest to get some rest before the big battle the following day and I needed time for myself.
   She is all I ever think about. I can not come to words how much I miss her. I could of prevented this. Maybe if I told her she would of lived. While I was telling Cassius that she died of worrying about me and the fact that Octavius and Antony have allied, I couldn't help but wonder if she was listening to me. I also told him that she had just found out before her death, she put a hot coal in her mouth and chocked. I could not stop drinking, every time I take a sip, it's as if every memory comes back to me. I should of done this, I should done that is something I keep saying over and over again.
   To make my life so much better I was paid a visit during the night from a strange figure. I don't remember much but I do remember him saying, "To tell thee thou shalt see me at Philippi" at first I thought this was Portia but I soon realized it was the ghost of Caesar. I could not rest anymore, so I got up and got ready for the war.

Portia and I 

I Should of Listened

Explaining myself to the Plebeians 

Antony saying speech

  Cassius and I decided to speak at Julius's funeral as well. I felt as if I owed the Roman's an explanation, or an answer for what I did. I wanted them on my side, and to understand I did it for them. I didn't want them scared of me or to distrust me. The honorable man that I am would speak the truth and that is what I did. Half of the plebeians went to Cassius's speech while the others came to mine. I told them to respect my honor and listen to what I had to say. "Not that I loved Caesar less, but that I loved Rome more." Now that I read the statement over, I can not believe I said something so true, something that I've always lived by. I also told them my reasonings. One of the best feelings ever was when they all began to cheer for me after my well thought out speech. I also offered that if my death was decided I would take my own life but the plebeians yelled, "Live, Brutus!" They were all on my side again, until Antony's speech as over.
    Mark Antony was told not to blame us for Caesar's death, and in a way he didn't but it encouraged the plebeians to come after Cassius and I. We both left the scene before his speech was over. They decided to riot against us, they wanted to burn my house down! I could not go home, so I ran away with Cassius. I regret trusting Antony. I regret letting him speak. I regret everything. Maybe I'm just upset but if this is what needs to be done. It will be done.
    I heard the Roman's are desperately looking for the conspirators that they killed Cinna. Not the conspirator, the poet! He was telling them that he is not Cinna the conspirator, but they kill him anyways. They killed an innocent man for no reason. I wonder what would have happened if they found us?

The ides of March

   Julius Caesar was killed on the 15th of March by the conspirators. We lead him to believe that Metellus Cimber's brother should be unbanished and return to Rome. Caesar refuses to let Cimber's brother return but I suggest that the sentence be repealed. Caesar, as always, does not listen and will not unbanish Cimber's brother. We all use this as an excuse to stab Caesar. Every conspirator stabs Caesar repeatedly. His last words, that I will never forget, were "Et tu, Brutus? Then Fall Caesar!" He was surprised and shocked I involved. Even though I felt horrible and made contact with the fallin Caesar , I still continued to stab him. Not my proudest moment but during all this chaos, I had the Roman people in mind the entire time.
    Citizens, Senators, and even Mark Antony ran away. They were all too afraid, they began to cry and run as if it were doomsday! The Romans did not realize that ambition has just been defeated! The conspirators and I bathed our hands in Caesar's blood all the way to our elbows. We also walked around Rome holding up our honorable, bloody weapons and yelled, "Peace, freedom and liberty!" Meanwhile this was going on, I felt so proud and victorious. I have never felt like that in my entire life.
    I was paid a visit by Antony's servant telling me that Antony would like to know my reasonings regarding the death of Caesar. He also wanted us to make sure we would not harm Antony(even though those weren't our intentions). This made Antony seem so wise and intelligent. He deserves a satisfying explantation. So that was what I gave him and much more. Antony, surprisingly, shook every conspirators hand(keep in mind we washed our hands with Caesar's blood). He wanted to know why we killed Caesar, and asked to place the body in the marketplace. He also wanted to speak at his funeral. I allowed him to. Cassius always disagrees with me but I had the final decision. Cassius thought Antony's speech would move the plebeians but this is out of respect. Julius deserves to have Antony speak at his funeral and that is exactly what he is going to do.

The Death Of Julius Caesar

My Beautiful Portia

Portia at her finest 

      It's kinda strange that my wife knows what is stressing me. I have tried my best to make it seem as if nothing was wrong but she told me I've been talking to myself, avoiding her, and scratching my head while I stamped my foot. She keeps insisting that this isn't let me do my everyday activities, I know I haven't been eating or sleeping or talking that much but I can not let her know what the real reason is. She is starting to get on my nerves a little bit. I know she has a right to know and she wants to know but I can not tell her. Portia has made me feel horrible. Our marriage is everything to me and I would never hurt her but this secret has to stay between us conspirators. I promised I'd tell her my commitments, but I don't want to frigthen her or worry her. She deserves better than that. I really hope she does not find out until after what is done, is done.
     Portia has a habit for over reacting. I'm just trying to protect her. She usually takes drastic measures if she finds out information that she does not like to hear. She is overdramatic. I hope this doesn't lead her to do something she'll regret. I keep saying " I hope", I hope I can stop with this and stop worrying about my wife. I will tell her soon and hopefully she understands me and does not judge me. She isn't the kind of person to judge but I have never killed anyone and she might not like this side of me. I don't even think I am. I'm starting to regret this but I committed and it wouldn't be the honorable thing to back out now. I must get focused and prepare myself for what will happen.
   

The Meeting

     It is the ides of March and I keep recieving letter regarding me to "wake up". I have been reading them in my garden. These letter have puzzled me. I wonder who could be writting these letters but everyone I get, encourages me to be apart of the conspiracy. I have not been able to sleep since I turned my back against my best friend, Juilius Caesar. I wonder how he would look at me if he ever found out. I mean what if the tables were turned? And he wanted to take me down? I wouldn't be so forgiving and i doubt Julius would. 

     I have just returned from the meeting with all the conspirators. They showed up in cloaks hiding their faces, isn't that strange? Cassius, Casca, Decius, Cinna, Metellus Cimber, and Trebonius make up the conspiracy, including me. I welcomed them all into my home and greeted them indiviually. 

    Cassius had the funniest but foolish idea of the whole night. Don't tell him I said that! Anyways, Cassius urged us to take an oath! AN OATH. Can you believe that? Oaths can be taken by any human being, but that isn't the issue, the issue is that any kind of person can take an oath. Liars, Cheaters, Murders, etc. could all take these oaths but still lie. Oaths are taken by men who can't be trusted. Actions speak louder than words so why should we take an oath when only our actions matter? If anyone were to break his word, Roman blood would be adulterated. 

     Not one single person commented on my long, wise speech I told the group. They just changed the subject to someone joining and pointless things. I started to ignore them since they ignored 

Conspiracy Discussing 

me until I heard a messy idea. Cassius again had such an excellent idea(I'm being sarcastic), he wanted us to not only kill Julius Caesar but to also kill Mark Antony. Just because he could be a threat to us, and it would prevent this supposably. They all seem to forget the reason why we're killing Caesar in the first place. It would also be way too messy and pointless. Our goal is to keep the Roman Empire away from Julius's ambition, not to kill all of Caesar's acquaintance's. It just isn't necessary. We all agreed and made the right decision to only kill Julius.

My Wonderful Garden 

     They all seemed to leave around three and we decided to meet around eight o'clock again at Caesar's house. I wish I could stay and blog more but my wife is calling, be sure to check back to see what my wife says! I promise ill write!